looking at iris's pictures i saw paul smyres remembers me as an "interesting" person. i think that an explanation of myself is in order (finally). i'm 58, i have suffered from extream pain, near-lethal depression, near-continuous panic attacks, and almost no short term or long term memory since birth. i'm very good at both sucking-it-up, faking-it, and blinding with bull shit. about 10 years ago i had my last and worst breakdown and went for better living thru chemistry. depression and panic are now 95% controlled. the pain and physical damage gets ibuprofen and sometimes vodka, but the memory is still non-existent. i remember my dreams and nightmares far, far better than i remember woodstock and india. with work i can usually figure out what i did yesterday but anything earlier than that is a blurred muddle. i can only remember what people look like by a photograph of them. i have a great talent for machines and physical design but i cannot remember the names of the parts. everything else is foggy colored blur of feelings and emotions and very much a mystery to me. this may explain why i have avoided woodstock reunions and other forms of contact. 10 years of meds and FB is what it has taken to get to where i am now. i'm open for questions.looking at iris's pictures i saw paul smyres remembers me as an "interesting" person. i think that an explanation of myself is in order (finally). i'm 58, i have suffered from extream pain, near-lethal depression, near-continuous panic attacks, and almost no short term or long term memory since birth. i'm very good at both sucking-it-up, faking-it, and blinding with bull shit. about 10 years ago i had my last and worst breakdown and went for better living thru chemistry. depression and panic are now 95% controlled. the pain and physical damage gets ibuprofen and sometimes vodka, but the memory is still non-existent. i remember my dreams and nightmares far, far better than i remember woodstock and india. with work i can usually figure out what i did yesterday but anything earlier than that is a blurred muddle. i can only remember what people look like by a photograph of them. i have a great talent for machines and physical design but i cannot remember the names of the parts. everything else is foggy colored blur of feelings and emotions and very much a mystery to me. this may explain why i have avoided woodstock reunions and other forms of contact. 10 years of meds and FB is what it has taken to get to where i am now. i'm open for questions.looking at iris's pictures i saw paul smyres remembers me as an "interesting" person. i think that an explanation of myself is in order (finally). i'm 58, i have suffered from extream pain, near-lethal depression, near-continuous panic attacks, and almost no short term or long term memory since birth. i'm very good at both sucking-it-up, faking-it, and blinding with bull shit. about 10 years ago i had my last and worst breakdown and went for better living thru chemistry. depression and panic are now 95% controlled. the pain and physical damage gets ibuprofen and sometimes vodka, but the memory is still non-existent. i remember my dreams and nightmares far, far better than i remember woodstock and india. with work i can usually figure out what i did yesterday but anything earlier than that is a blurred muddle. i can only remember what people look like by a photograph of them. i have a great talent for machines and physical design but i cannot remember the names of the parts. everything else is foggy colored blur of feelings and emotions and very much a mystery to me. this may explain why i have avoided woodstock reunions and other forms of contact. 10 years of meds and FB is what it has taken to get to where i am now. i'm open for questions.